When I’m with people, I rate the interaction on a scale of 1-5.
A 5 is a, “What a day! I can’t believe what that person’s doing. This is incredible. We had amazing conversation. I feel like I need to do more or think more. That was just great, a phenomenal, phenomenal experience.”
A 1 is a spiritual vampire. Every time I’m with that person it’s gossip and drama and why they’re mad at people, why they hate people, why they think the world is going to you-know-where, and they’re just so angry. And what a drain, I feel sick, I need to go drink some wine or eat some pizza or something after that kind of meeting.
If you’re below a 4, bye. I don’t have time to let other people drain me with their negativity, their toxic views, their terrible outlook on life. That is draining. And if you’re using your energy or having it drained, and you have to reboot your energy, that’s energy you didn’t do something aspirational for.
Energy can be used only one of two ways.
You can either use your energy repairing yourself from the hazards of the world … It’s called playing defense … or you can use your energy to push your life forward, this is called playing offense.
I always ask, “Is this action moving my life forward?”
I’m not moving forward in my life with this person in my life. I’m now spending all this time trying to regain my energy to get back to normal so I can go do what I want to do. That’s lifestyle design. Ruthless energy focus.
And a lot of people don’t think that that’s for them, and hey. It’s your own life. If people are holding you back, that might be why you’re not getting to where you want to be in life, ’cause if you hang out with negative people, your energy’s drained.
If your energy is drained, your mindset is naturally going to be less optimistic.
And if you’re spending time with toxic people, negative people, then you’re not going to have an optimistic mindset.
Energy and Lifestyle.
The same is true of lifestyle. A lot of people struggle with various issues in their life, and I know personally that if I eat too much bread, for example, then my body’s inflamed. I’m not gluten intolerant, but I just don’t feel as good, because mindset is a feeling.
Energy and Mindset mindset.
Mindset is a moment, mindset is self-talk. Mindset is a feeling, mindset is an outlook. If you’re eating things or engaging in activities that don’t make you feel good, maybe dating people you shouldn’t date, then your mindset’s going to be negative. You’re not going to feel good. And if you don’t feel good, then that’s going to fold back into your habits, and then your habits are going to reinforce the negative mindset. And what I try to do is rather than have vicious circles, I try to have virtuous circles.
Virtue is something you don’t hear people talk about. Everybody wants to life a world of vice and how can you indulge and be a hedonist, and that is why people are sick and the world is sick.
I don’t have time for sick people.
This is controversial to a lot of people. To me, it’s so banal that I can’t believe it angers people.
Why are people angry when I talk about cutting people out?
Because they are low consciousness!
If I read an article about cutting out negative people, I’d think, “Yes, that’s smart. I do the same.”
The biggest lifestyle choice people can make is to analyze and rate every interaction you have with a supposed friend or a supposed family member. And if people are not making you feel a certain way, if they’re making you feel a bad way, getting rid of those people, cutting those people out of your lives or at least eliminating the time, reducing the time you spend with them … That will probably have more impact on the way you feel than any single decision you can make in your life.
Like any other skill … And I tend to think of mindset as a skill. Even though people think of mindset as a destination and a way of life, I think of it as a skill. And the more you practice it, the better you get at it. And then you level up. A lot of things that worry people just don’t worry me at all. I don’t even view them as concerns.
Watch the rest in The Power of Mindset Master Class.